Thanks for facebooking me to tell me that you're not interested. "Oh I like you as a friend" is like the worst thing. Don't offer that shit. Also for the motherfucking record, I was not initiating the affection, I was responding to what was put out there. So go fuck yourself. I'm glad to know I'm too ugly/fat/stupid/mentally ill/not confident enough for you. I know she put you up to this. I hope you're happy with each other.

I'm sitting at home and I'm completely mortified because I know my ex-best friend is the reason this is happening and he is faking ignorance with me like he does when he doesn't want me to feel embarrassed. The awful thing about being betrayed by your close friend is that you can see their fingerprints all over the situation, and it just makes me want to die because why would she do this to me? I don't understand and I will probably just completely cut our mutual friends out of my life because I can't trust her to not make it awful between me and all the rest of them.

I was considering asking someone out for the first time in at least 8 years. So far every time I've tried, it has gone incredibly badly for me and results in public humiliation. I think maybe I won't try anymore. I think maybe I won't trust my friends anymore either.