In case you were wondering, I now have an ex best friend. And as far as I know, she and the dubstep boy are fucking. My life is awesome sometimes. She still has my extra keys and I don't know how to ask for them back without causing a problem. I'm gonna find out from my dad if he can change the locks for me since I can't afford to pay someone to do it.

I've had a weird few weeks in general. The bath salts guy is now claiming he didn't dose me and then he tried to get me to come over to his house again. I declined, because I'm not stupid and do not plan to have that happen to me again. Especially now that I don't have someone to call that will come rescue me.

There was also a weird drunken phone call a few hours ago from my (unhappily) married friend who I swear has developed feelings for me. He was one of my main sources of social interaction lately, but now I'm not sure how to deal with him.

Creepy guy at work has also returned to his pursuit of me and keeps trying to invite himself over to my house now. I keep telling him no and he keeps asking like the answer will change.

I wish I could catch a break here. I feel like I sound ridiculous and paranoid when I tell anyone that men have weird fixations and attractions when it comes to me, but they do. I wish I was making it up. Its disturbing how much people are attracted to those who are incredibly damaged, and it ends up causing even more damage.

It's not that I'm suicidal, it's just sometimes the idea of not being alive to deal with all this shit sounds like such a relief. I don't do anything but I sure as hell fantasize about just getting out of all of this.